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Stupid & Funny from Around the World :Continued

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Height of misunderstanding:

Mr. Kapoor comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: "I have great news... I'm a month overdue. I think we're going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can't tell anybody." The next day, Mrs. Kapoor receives a telephone call from Reliance Energy because the electricity bill has not been paid.
" Am I speaking to Mrs. Kapoor? " "Yes... speaking'' replies Mrs Kapoor.

Reliance guy, "You're a month overdue, you know!" "How do YOU know?" stammers the young woman. "Well, ma'am, it's in our files!" says the Reliance guy. "What are you saying? It's in your files... HOW ???" " Yes ..... We have a system of finding out who's overdue " " GOD !!!... This is too much..." "Madam, I am sorry... I am just following orders... I have to inform that you are overdue.." "I know that ... let me talk to my husband about this tonight. He will speak to your company tomorrow.. " That night, she tells her husband about the incident, and he, mad as a bull,rushes to Reliance office the next day morning. "What's going on? You have it on file that my wife is a month overdue? What business is that of yours?" the husband shouts.. "Just calm down," says the lady at the reception at Reliance, "it's nothing serious. All you have to do is pay us." "PAY you? And if I refuse?" "Well, in that case, sir, we'd have no option but to cut yours off.." "And what would my wife do then?" the husband asks. "Well... I don't know. I guess she'd have to use a candle.
 
http://indianexpress.com/article/tr...-surgery-causing-laser-to-catch-fire-3732773/

Woman farts during surgery, causing laser to catch fire
The patient, who was undergoing surgery which involved a laser being applied to her cervix, passed gas during the operation and ended up being badly burned.
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Express Web Desk | New Delhi | Updated: November 1, 2016 9:58 pm
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This is one burn story this woman would NOT want to share! (Representational picture, Source: Thinkstock Images)
It is a fact not as universally known as it should that farts are flammable. Although, those who have seen the 1994 comedy Dumb and Dumber will definitely remember Jim Carrey’s fart scene. But as hilarious as that sequence was, things didn’t turn out as pretty for this woman at the Tokyo Medical University Hospital.

The patient, who was undergoing surgery which involved a laser being applied to her cervix, passed gas during the operation and ended up being badly burned. According to a hospital report, the unfortunately timed fart ignited the laser being used for the surgery. The woman, in her 30s, was left screaming in pain after the fire apparently burnt massive chunks of her body, including the waist and legs. The surgery was apparently being held in the Shinjuku Ward of the hospital, according to a report by Japanese newspaper The Asahi Shimbun.

The bizarre incident came to light in a report by external experts that was released on October 28, say agency reports. The incident itself apparently happened on April 15, 2016. The committee report clarifies that no flammable materials were used in the operation during the surgery and that every other equipment was functioning properly, thus eliminating any possibility of a gas leak from elsewhere that could have cause the fire.

“When the patient’s intestinal gas leaked into the space of the operation (room), it ignited with the irradiation of the laser, and the burning spread, eventually reaching the surgical drape and causing the fire,” said the report, which only recently came to light. According to an Australian news report, the Tokyo Medical University Hospital holds the distinction of being the only facility in Japan to do surgery using robots.
 

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