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Smile a while.

cactuslily58

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Just thought I'd share some "reasons to smile with you"....

Some Unconventional facts of life!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving.

Having one child makes you a parent having two, a referee.

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is husband!

A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.

Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without... but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.

You can't buy love . . . but you pay heavily for it.

Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give or she'll take it anyway.

My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.

Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.

It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.

Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you!
 
How about this one:


Ed was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary.

His wife was really upset. She told him "Tomorrow morning I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT HAD BETTER BE THERE."

The next morning Ed got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up,

she looked out of the window and sure enough there was a small box giftwrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, she put on her robe, ran out on to the driveway and picked up the box.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Funeral services for Ed have been scheduled for Friday.
 

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